Problems When Two Narcissists Marry

The narcissist character comes from the story of Greek myth about an attractive hunter named Narcissus. Once you leave the marriage, in an effort to win you back, a narcissistic may resort to manipulating you with charm. They fear being considered selfish if they act assertively. How many red flags do you need in order to run away and save yourself? One red flag? Ten red flags? How about an army of red flags? Well, let me give you a few, 30 to be exact; dead give-aways you are dating a Narcissist. The truth is, a narcissistic woman creates as much havoc as any narcissistic man. When I finally had the guts to finally get away from him, he refused to divorce me or sign paper. Narcissists are a different type of persons who feel that they are superior to everyone in this world. Can two Narcissists establish a long term, stable relationship? Answer: There is no clear answer to whether Narcissistic Couples can succeed. He is made a mockery by his accentuated denial of reality, by his obdurate refusal to grow up, an eternal, malformed child in the sagging body of a decaying man. I just realized today, I am married and have been with a narcissist for 20 years, I thought I was the problem. Garfield, you wrote: "If they fall in love with another narcissist. He reverts to old forms, re-adopts hoary habits, succumbs to erstwhile temptations. He alienated my children from me. But the problem is, they don't necessarily make better leaders. On top of that, people with malignant narcissistic tendencies. Narcissism and Infidelity… the Therapist's Burden Couples therapists are grateful for the fact that only a small number of couples will present with full-blown Narcissistic Personality Disorder because the extreme end of everyday garden-variety narcissism is challenging enough. Narcissistic personality disorder is one of a group of conditions called dramatic personality disorders. If only you knew this beforehand so you could have said, 'I do not'. Realize that unless the narcissist understands that he has a problem and has sought professional help, he will not change. Unlike the normal people, when a narcissist dumped you, it becomes so devastating that they make you feel worst and useless. It helps to have someone by your side who knows and understands how narcissists work. The paradox is that the children who grow up to be narcissists don't see that they have a problem. There is no give and take in this kind of relationship. It can mess you up for life. Their problems include anxiety, low self-esteem, and eating disorders. And they feed on each other, worship each - Answered by a verified Mental Health Professional We use cookies to give you the best possible experience on our website. Amy and Rob had been married for four years the day he turned a gun on her. I am in a 3+ year relationship with an unemployed, and married narcissist! I was a happy, healthy and succesful woman before I met him…. For instance, a woman with a narcissistic personality disorder has a hard time reading social cues and responding to them. They can't understand that a problem could be about work, not about them, so they make terrible coworkers. I can see she is a narcissist and do everything I can not to get played by her. Shari Schreiber, M. Narcissists always manage to make the conversation about themselves. People with these disorders have intense, unstable emotions and a distorted self-image. Are you ready to end the heartache? Learn the signs! Narcissistic and codependent marriage problems are more common than you think. Narcissistic personality disorder is further characterized by an abnormal love of self, an exaggerated sense of superiority and importance, and a. Marriage Problems by Susan Heitler Ph. The Covert Narcissist Marriage dynamic will not allow room for a dialogue about their partner's thoughts and feelings. When you finally learn the signs of a narcissist and are ready to end the relationship, your self-esteem may already be damaged. The two collaborate in this macabre dance. It's an excellent starting point as it was my first introduction to the idea of narcissistic mothers after Googling "mothers jealous of their daughters. ) The Narcissist's Idealized Mirror Image Those familiar. been through a previous relationship with another narcissist. The problem is, whether the covert narcissist is a colleague, friend, or partner, if you are their chosen victim, you will already know about their alleged problems. I knew that something was wrong during this marriage but didn't know what. If you have two narcissistic parents the same holds true. Amy and Rob had been married for four years the day he turned a gun on her. The crazy thing about being married to a narcissist (for 26 years!) is their ability to blame everything on the spouse. Can two Narcissists establish a long term, stable relationship? Answer: There is no clear answer to whether Narcissistic Couples can succeed. Sons of narcissistic fathers are driven by lack of confidence. A narcissist is often unable to truly be vulnerable, which can lead to serious problems with emotional intimacy. He was so charming and loving. When you understand how things work covert narcissists, you can evaluate whether your marriage is viable for the long haul or not. I don't know if that is a short time or an average time or a long time - I just know that I expected to be an emotional mess for months. A sadistic sense of pleasure at someone else's pain. I have been in counseling for the whole 19 years of marriage…. The very manner in which they perceive themselves and look upon others impairs true intimacy and depth in relationships. They have a problem with people who may reject them," Twenge said. I had no idea at the time that there were so many websites devoted to fighting narcissism, or worse-learning to live with it because you're married to it, or you have a parent who's a. Narcissists always manage to make the conversation about themselves. A narcissist needs to be admired and shows little or no empathy or concern for the problems, difficulties, or even the interests, of other people. The unfortunate part of being married to a narcissist is that you already know how controlling and manipulative they can be. However, my problem is he might be somewhat of a narcissist but not 100%. This article outlines some guidelines that people can follow if they have a narcissistic partner. You might well believe your narcissistic spouse when he tells you how you are the problem, and if you just changed and did these things he wanted, well, life would be grand. And they feed on each other, worship each - Answered by a verified Mental Health Professional We use cookies to give you the best possible experience on our website. Their relationship had been turbulent from the outset, but by 2005 their farm was failing, and, Amy says, "We were in. This is what genuine narcissists do. To the typical narcissistic woman, you are no more than an object of "secondary narcissistic supply" that provides her with whatever she wants or needs within the relationship. Narcissists are a different type of persons who feel that they are superior to everyone in this world. Your spouse may truly believe that they are a victim in every situation, which leads them to act without compassion or regard for your feelings. blame for interpersonal problems. Brought up by Nparents, yes that's a plural. They're two different types of narcissist, one more dominant than other, but nonetheless still two narcissist. Of two personality types that are perpetually drawn together - the Borderline and Narcissist regularly find common attraction. Use one of these aspects as a benchmark to convince your spouse to get help. I am married to a narcissist also…. 6 Signs You're In Love With A SERIOUS Narcissist. ) And relationships with the vulnerable narcissists can be particularly challenging. After all, I had been married for 30 years. He keeps emotional abuse, verbal abuse, economic abuse, and sexual abuse in his marital toolbox because they work for him. Whether they are manipulating each other, who knows, except people close enough to them to be surer. Narcissism. People with these disorders have intense, unstable emotions and a distorted self-image. " ~ Megan Holgate, Life & Divorce Coach. The next couple of days were up and down. Discussions were videotaped and coded for the presence of narcissistic behaviors. The sad thing is that I am losing a friend too. I don't want to be with him, but I can't seem to let go. If being married to a narcissist seemed like hell, divorcing a narcissist is hell on steroids! Separation and divorce trigger the narcissist's deepest insecurities and fears of rejection and abandonment. In the quest for narcissistic supply, the somatic narcissist resorts to serial sexual conquests. He had come to see me with the hope to rescue me from my titillating nightmare, living in hell. Of course, I already knew many of their flaws and already had no problem accepting them. The narcissist character comes from the story of Greek myth about an attractive hunter named Narcissus. Making sure that the two camps have NO INTERACTION. blame for interpersonal problems. Recent studies confirm that narcissistic parents are incapable of truly loving others, even their own children. No matter how good your solution may be, share it with a narcissist and they will either find reasons why it doesn't work or will suddenly come to the "insight" that the true problem lies elsewhere. Big, is a 5-Star Deception. My problem was trying to marry two people and an alpaca. I've recently left a relationship where the lady I was seeing was separated from (but still married to) a covert narcissist. My 18 year old son left shortly after an orchestrated move by his father. Don't give him the satisfaction. took a while to figure it out…what in child rearing causes a child to grow up that way…. When you search the internet you will not find very much is written about them because those few people who experience the wrath tend to get damaged in such a way that reliving the story for other peoples benefit is not viable. 10 Rules for Divorcing a Narcissist 1. All couples from time to time hit bumps in the road -- upsetting situations that can lead to more serious marriage problems. I was married to a narcissist for just under 20 years. "The ego of a narcissistic man will bruise easily. 5 Reasons A Narcissist Can't Stay In Love Lifestyle "My husband didn't need to raise his voice or hit me, as his method of violence was the words that could cut through me sharper than a knife ever could, destroying any sense of self-confidence I previously had. It can mess you up for life. I married my first husband in 1981 without knowing about narcissistic personality. I was recently asked about how two narcissists ended up together. Are you ready to end the heartache? Learn the signs! Narcissistic and codependent marriage problems are more common than you think. This is a common delusion among narcissists and egomaniacs, which means this way of thinking is ubiquitous in our culture. Either way, the narcissist has gained more ammunition to use. My best friend visited us the other day. The Founder and Leader of the Glorious Wave International Church, Prophet Emmanuel Badu Kobi has sparked controversies on social media with his somewhat baseless research about women from the Ashanti tribe, Ewe and Fante. The article discusses the co-narcissistic syndrome and its treatment, and gives case examples of patients who suffer from this problem. (Read Part 1. "They have a problem with heterosexual women, because those are the people who might see through them, reject them and not give them the attention and adulation they feel they deserve. My daughter, now 18 has lived with me for 2 years. The narcissistic abuse dictionary defines word salad as: "Circular language tactics narcissists use to ensure that conversations with others never have satisfactory resolutions for the other party; can include projection, stonewalling, blameshifting, sympathy ploys, bringing up something the partner did, bringing up unrelated issues, starting. I knew that something was wrong during this marriage but didn't know what. They judge as needy. He asked me to marry him after two months. Whatever narcissists have (or think they have) is what they use to look down on other people with. In many cases, narcissistic behavior patterns have led to problems in the narcissist's marriage, family, friendships, and career. and now I have picked up his bad habits (smoking, etc), I no longer work-out and I never ever feel truly content anymore. They are also known as invert Narcissists. Counseling advice: Dealing with narcissists can be very challenging in a marriage. Narcissism. I tell clients who are co-parenting with a narcissist to keep their expectations low. Moreover, they lack empathy, frequently blaming others, thinking too highly of onseelf and other such traits are the characteristics of a narcissistic person. Whether they are manipulating each other, who knows, except people close enough to them to be surer. He is made a mockery by his accentuated denial of reality, by his obdurate refusal to grow up, an eternal, malformed child in the sagging body of a decaying man. Being a pawn, maid, and servant to a demanding mother growing up, taught you that saying "no" isn't an option. Big, is a 5-Star Deception. Narcissists don't make the most pleasant friends or dinner guests -- they're self-absorbed, arrogant and have little concern for others -- but according to a new study, there's one particular personality type that does enjoy being around narcissists. Like, I'm less of a consumption-based person / small footprint, therefore I'm better. Even though there are always going to be problems in a relationship, Sherman says you both can do things to minimize marriage problems, if not avoid them altogether. Respect for you and the marriage: The narcissist will side with others against you, talk behind your back about you and all while smile like a Cheshire cat at you. Making sure that the two camps have NO INTERACTION. If there is someone in your life with a narcissistic personality, knowing how to deal with her will make your relationship a whole lot easier. Relationship Problems with Narcissists. I don't want to be with him, but I can't seem to let go. While much digital ink has been spilled warning men to stay away from narcissistic women, there isn't a whole lot of literature on inverted narcissist women. The point of this article is to demonstrate that narcissism isn't necessarily a bad thing and that almost every human that I know of shares in the traits and what defines a narcissist. This individual as far back as you can remember was demanding, self absorbed, highly competitive and didn't care about how you felt. I am a covert narcissist and have behaved terribly in my 37 years on earth and have hurt people emotionally along the way and believe it or not, I'm trying to get help now. If you assumed that the only kind of person. I didn't see that I was a victim of abuse until I found out he was cheating. Author Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph. "He did not talk to me for two or three days, even. Psychological research suggests that narcissistic personalities fall into two categories. Indeed, the high-level narcissist, like the irresistible but nefarious Mr. FACT: If your man/woman meets all of the criteria of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, this is serious. To say that your life will be difficult is an understatement. Little wonder we are so ready to say 'I do'. For him, that is. This kid, contrary to the golden child, is at fault for all the family problems. I don't know if he is a narcissist or not. If it's a yes for all of these, well, then it's a good chance that they're a narcissist. He is made a mockery by his accentuated denial of reality, by his obdurate refusal to grow up, an eternal, malformed child in the sagging body of a decaying man. I felt lucky to be with him because he's so handsome and charming. When divorcing a narcissist who is the sole income earner, how does the narcissist handle it or react? If your narcissistic spouse is also the breadwinner of the family, you will need to seek immediate child support, alimony and attorney fees orders and obtain those temporary orders so you can maintain the status quo while your divorce is pending. This is a Psychology Today article by Karyl McBride, Ph. it really was a marriage how long we were together I'd rather not say I don't want to give myself away. If being married to a narcissist seemed like hell, divorcing a narcissist is hell on steroids! Separation and divorce trigger the narcissist's deepest insecurities and fears of rejection and abandonment. And they feed on each other, worship each - Answered by a verified Mental Health Professional We use cookies to give you the best possible experience on our website. Whether they are manipulating each other, who knows, except people close enough to them to be surer. If you work with narcissists, were raised by one (or two!), have them in your family, or are in a relationship with. Inverted narcissists (also known as inverts, covert narcissists or codependents) share many traits with overt (regular) narcissists, with the biggest difference being how they interact with others. Try to take the focus off of that, and there will be very big problems. Of course we have two young (3. I was married to a deep narcissist for 20 years and never knew the extent until I read this article. He needed that status of me leaving him. My 18 year old son left shortly after an orchestrated move by his father. I thought it might be helpful to share her experience with others, to see just how gradual and controlling a relationship with an abusive Narcissist can be. My sister learned to be that way so she could gain my father's acceptance. I cannot fully express the journey it has been—physically, emotionally, logistically, financially—and I am grateful for each day that I do not have to suffer his abuse. This is a common delusion among narcissists and egomaniacs, which means this way of thinking is ubiquitous in our culture. It's been two years since I left my ex-husband, aka the narcissist in my life. Their relationship had been turbulent from the outset, but by 2005 their farm was failing, and, Amy says, "We were in. Sons of narcissistic fathers are driven by lack of confidence. If there is someone in your life with a narcissistic personality, knowing how to deal with her will make your relationship a whole lot easier. ) The Narcissist's Idealized Mirror Image Those familiar. ) And relationships with the vulnerable narcissists can be particularly challenging. When you understand how things work covert narcissists, you can evaluate whether your marriage is viable for the long haul or not. He keeps emotional abuse, verbal abuse, economic abuse, and sexual abuse in his marital toolbox because they work for him. 5 and 5) kids that I love fiercely. This time I learned something new… Why You Should Never Marry a Narcissist. Narcissistic Siblings Cause Psychological and Financial Family Ruptures non prescription generic cialis You have known this brother or sister all of your life-at least you thought you did. My daughter, now 18 has lived with me for 2 years. Two months ago the fog finally lifted after 31 years of lies and abuse, which I would take the blame for. (See: Ways Vulnerable Narcissists Relate. They are characterized by traits of extraversion and dominance. Psychologists formally recognize two types of narcissism: The attention-seeking narcissist: People with grandiose narcissistic traits are recognizable by their pursuit of attention and power and status, often as politicians, celebrities, or cultural leaders. To the typical narcissistic woman, you are no more than an object of "secondary narcissistic supply" that provides her with whatever she wants or needs within the relationship. No matter how good your solution may be, share it with a narcissist and they will either find reasons why it doesn't work or will suddenly come to the "insight" that the true problem lies elsewhere. My ex husband is a diagnosed as a narcissist and has put me and my child through hell to make me pay for leaving him. My sister learned to be that way so she could gain my father's acceptance. The narcissistic abuse dictionary defines word salad as: "Circular language tactics narcissists use to ensure that conversations with others never have satisfactory resolutions for the other party; can include projection, stonewalling, blameshifting, sympathy ploys, bringing up something the partner did, bringing up unrelated issues, starting. Realize that unless the narcissist understands that he has a problem and has sought professional help, he will not change. Lack of empathy leads to many social problems. My father was a narcissist too, so it all appeared to be familiar I guess, and so I stepped forward into marriage with her. My problem was trying to marry two people and an alpaca. I didn't see that I was a victim of abuse until I found out he was cheating. Amy and Rob had been married for four years the day he turned a gun on her. 10 Rules for Divorcing a Narcissist 1. Psychologists formally recognize two types of narcissism: The attention-seeking narcissist: People with grandiose narcissistic traits are recognizable by their pursuit of attention and power and status, often as politicians, celebrities, or cultural leaders. I don't know if he is a narcissist or not. In addition to securing the. They are also known as invert Narcissists. I divorced him in 1988 which was the best thing I ever did for myself. Like, I'm less of a consumption-based person / small footprint, therefore I'm better. Discussions were videotaped and coded for the presence of narcissistic behaviors. The point of this article is to demonstrate that narcissism isn't necessarily a bad thing and that almost every human that I know of shares in the traits and what defines a narcissist. Narcissistic Siblings Cause Psychological and Financial Family Ruptures non prescription generic cialis You have known this brother or sister all of your life-at least you thought you did. I was recently asked about how two narcissists ended up together. They're two different types of narcissist, one more dominant than other, but nonetheless still two narcissist. This is quite common; in fact, there are studies indicating that narcissists are attracted to other narcissists--as life partners, business partners, and friends. My 18 year old son left shortly after an orchestrated move by his father. The very manner in which they perceive themselves and look upon others impairs true intimacy and depth in relationships. It's all about what they need, what they want. To the typical narcissistic woman, you are no more than an object of "secondary narcissistic supply" that provides her with whatever she wants or needs within the relationship. blame for interpersonal problems. I am writing this as after much online research, I fear I may be married to a narcissist. He was so charming and loving. Narcissistic Husband Traits Living with a narcissistic man can turn any relationship into a total nightmare. So how DO you deal with a narcissistic wife? Make no mistake… being in a relationship with a narcissist can be extremely damaging. ) And relationships with the vulnerable narcissists can be particularly challenging. Nine months later we were married, and a year after that I had a baby. A narcissist is often unable to truly be vulnerable, which can lead to serious problems with emotional intimacy. I guess I was blindsided when he started verbally abusing me and blaming me for all of our problems. Dear Narcissist Problems, I'm almost freaked out even writing you because of the narcissism but I need some quick advice. Narcissists also deny emotional needs. I know what you're thinking, there are two kinds? Yes, there are. The narcissist - being the rigid, precariously balanced structure that he is - can't change. How to Deal With a Narcissistic Husband. Brought up by Nparents, yes that's a plural. I've been waiting two hours for them!" This type of reaction will only give the narcissist pleasure, as one of his goals is to make sure you are miserable. This is a Psychology Today article by Karyl McBride, Ph. That being said, a person with this mental disorder may turn away any prospect of a stable spouse with the antisocial symptoms of narcissism. He reverts to old forms, re-adopts hoary habits, succumbs to erstwhile temptations. By doing so, the narcissist wants someone who will make him look goodit's as if they are saying, "See who I'm with. If forced to generalise, I would say that two narcissists OF THE SAME TYPE cannot maintain a stable, long term FULL FLEDGED relationship. The Covert Narcissist Marriage Dynamic. You've made a fair observation. I don't know if he is a narcissist or not. My daughter, now 18 has lived with me for 2 years. I was married to a narcissist for just under 20 years. That leaves you everyone's punching bag and worried about everyone but yourself. I tell clients who are co-parenting with a narcissist to keep their expectations low. Indeed, the high-level narcissist, like the irresistible but nefarious Mr. I moved out of our bedroom two months ago and am looking for my own place with my younger son. It is rare to find a narcissist who has not been married and with some of our kind the marriages will number two or more. I put up with all of the abuse the article speaks of. I divorced him in 1988 which was the best thing I ever did for myself. Having been married to an undiagnosed narcissist, I can attest they are emotionally abusive, must win every argument and will make your life a living hell. How to recognize a narcissist : Never love anything that can't love you back. and now I have picked up his bad habits (smoking, etc), I no longer work-out and I never ever feel truly content anymore. When you search the internet you will not find very much is written about them because those few people who experience the wrath tend to get damaged in such a way that reliving the story for other peoples benefit is not viable. Till I discovered all this info today! I feel relieved yet not hopeful, I have been crying due to all the rejection I feel from him, he is his priority. In addition, narcissists often have deep childhood wounds. He is charming, we married quickly, he started to. Wherever you are along your path with or without the narcissist in your life now, it is vital to understand that the narcissist's disorder, unhappiness, and rage are not your responsibility. The crazy thing about being married to a narcissist (for 26 years!) is their ability to blame everything on the spouse. If only you knew this beforehand so you could have said, 'I do not'. A narcissist with money, like Mr. Being married to a covert narcissist is a personal hell. Although, narcissists don't usually put the needs of others first, some narcissists are actually people-pleasers and can be very generous. Marriage Problems by Susan Heitler Ph. I was married to a narcissist for just under 20 years. How to Deal With a Narcissistic Husband. On the other hand, it can be a perfect fit, albeit painful, for ordinary codependents, because their low self-esteem is boosted by the narcissist's attributes and aura of success. It can mess you up for life. Narcissistic Men and The Women Who Love Them,- Dr. The narcissist doesn't want their issues to be solved, they much prefer to blame others for their problems. 6 Signs You're In Love With A SERIOUS Narcissist. Narcissistic rage ranges from direct confrontation with name-calling and hurtful slurs, to calculated, closed down reactions like giving their partner the silent treatment for hours at a time. He alienated my children from me. It's because they have a problem with anyone who will reject them. If you assumed that the only kind of person. been through a previous relationship with another narcissist. My in-laws are both classic narcissists and they have been married for almost 40 years. Unlike the normal people, when a narcissist dumped you, it becomes so devastating that they make you feel worst and useless. Recent studies confirm that narcissistic parents are incapable of truly loving others, even their own children. If forced to generalise, I would say that two narcissists OF THE SAME TYPE cannot maintain a stable, long term FULL FLEDGED relationship. Once he has you again, he will revert to his narcissistic behavior. How to recognize a narcissist : Never love anything that can't love you back. That leaves you everyone's punching bag and worried about everyone but yourself. There's no understanding, no support. Note that Narcissists and other abusers call their targets names and then pretend that they are kidding (i. 5 and 5) kids that I love fiercely. Narcissists in Long Term Relationships: A Case Study, Part 1 I recently received an email from a reader in Texas. Indeed, the high-level narcissist, like the irresistible but nefarious Mr. Either way, the narcissist has gained more ammunition to use. Confessions of a Recovering Narcissist and withdraw from the two-ness of the relationship. How to Deal With a Narcissistic Husband. All couples from time to time hit bumps in the road -- upsetting situations that can lead to more serious marriage problems. Some narcissists, like communal narcissists, aren't hoarders because they see a superiority / cultural caché in living more austerely. Narcissistic Husband Traits Living with a narcissistic man can turn any relationship into a total nightmare. He had come to see me with the hope to rescue me from my titillating nightmare, living in hell. Two weeks after we met he proposed to me and we married three months after that. We have two daughters. Even though there are always going to be problems in a relationship, Sherman says you both can do things to minimize marriage problems, if not avoid them altogether. "He did not talk to me for two or three days, even. For the narcissist, any relationship problems are about YOU, certainly not about them and their awesome selves. One other thing to remember: Narcissism can be caused by a traumatic past. He asked me to marry him after two months. Nine months later we were married, and a year after that I had a baby. Kept promises: A promise, is a promise, is a promise, unless you are married to a narcissist. Whether it's a true story or not, this is just a story I was told and so if it's you know not a true story, I can only report on my knowledge as I heard it and what I was told. In addition to securing the. He needed that status of me leaving him. Can a Narcissistic marry a Narcissistic? Oh, how I wish they would. Having been married to an undiagnosed narcissist, I can attest they are emotionally abusive, must win every argument and will make your life a living hell. Female narcissists, especially if they also possess antisocial traits, can cause just as much psychological harm as male malignant narcissists. You lose your sense of "self" and your needs, wants, and desires. If forced to generalise, I would say that two narcissists OF THE SAME TYPE cannot maintain a stable, long term FULL FLEDGED relationship. I was married to a narcissist and this whole blog has helped me, I was so affected that I caused me to write a book about my 10 years of pain. Narcissists may view vulnerability as a form of weakness, or they may be afraid vulnerability will cause them to be abandoned or hurt. The lower down an empath becomes, the higher a narcissist will feel. My father was a narcissist too, so it all appeared to be familiar I guess, and so I stepped forward into marriage with her. trying to hang in there…it has brought me to my knees, which is good. I didn't see that I was a victim of abuse until I found out he was cheating. There is no give and take in this kind of relationship. In the quest for narcissistic supply, the somatic narcissist resorts to serial sexual conquests. To say that your life will be difficult is an understatement. Narcissists are a different type of persons who feel that they are superior to everyone in this world. Empathy is not an active feature of a Covert Narcissist Marriage. I had two very significant relationships one involved an engagement I really should've married that guy he wasn't perfect either but definitely not a narcissist we were just too young. People with these disorders have intense, unstable emotions and a distorted self-image. I work part time and take care of the kids part time. Divorcing the Narcissist While going through a divorce is not easy for anyone, when the person you are divorcing is a narcissist, it can be a living nightmare.